You can't bank sleep..and other useless advice...

It's been so long since I've written anything and part of it is because I am majorly sleep deprived.  One of the dumbest pieces of advice several people gave me before the girls came home was "get your sleep now because when they come home you won't get any."  Really?  Believe me, I still tried it and guess what?  It doesn't matter!  I could have hibernated like a bear for months and would have still been as sleep deprived as I am right now.  I'm not even sure if I am forming words correctly, but at least I am making an attempt to write something.  I anticipate that I have a total of maybe fifteen minutes before someone starts making noises and is ready to eat.

Lily Rose

Chloe Marie

I was also told to get the girls on a schedule as early as possible which also went along with the doctor telling me to let them "feed on demand."  As I have determined, these two bits of advice do not go together.  I have tried to get them on a schedule, really, I have, but the thing is that if you are letting them "feed on demand" and then try to make them eat, you're screwed.  For example, I tried to get Chloe to eat the other night to get her to stay on schedule with Lily.  She ate two ounces and promptly fell asleep.  I tickled her, rubbed her feet, and even jiggled her.  She was perfectly content and refused to take any more.  After that, guess what happened?  She was ready to feed again just about an hour later and then it was another two ounces.  This is leading to my gradual insanity.  What I have found that does work is not making her eat and instead waiting until she is really hungry and feeding her then.  Sure, she's not on the exact same schedule as Lily, but it is better than feeding every single hour.  (and I was wondering why I never get anything done.)



How I am maintaining my sanity is because of my friends and family.  You really find out quickly who your true friends are during a life changing experience such as this one.  Brice and I rarely have time to even go to the grocery store these days.   We were attempting to be "extreme couponers" because we saw the show during a late night feeding and decided that was a good idea.  What it resulted in was a bunch of newspapers and cut coupons lying around all over the place.  Some of our friends saw that we had no food in the refrigerator other than formula and maybe stuff for a few sandwiches and brought us a hot meal from time to time.  I have come to appreciate a hot meal.  I'm not picky.  I'm just so grateful to have it.  Our friends have also done our dishes, watched Lily and Chloe for a few hours so we could take a nap or get a few things done, helped us mow our yard, and have even done our laundry.  Brice's mom has been over here more times than I can count and has done all of the above for us and then some.  I just can't believe that these special people would sacrifice their time and energy to help us out.  We will never be able to repay their kindness, but we will certainly try.

Brice rocking both girls in their bassinets



I was talking to my friend Holly who also adopted recently and we have both had the same unique experience.  We have both walked by a mirror holding a baby and had to stop because we were so amazed that there was actually a baby in our arms.  I have wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember and there are times that I go in our nursery and look at those two precious babies sleeping there and have tears in my eyes.  I cannot believe the selfless, amazing gift that we received.  Lily and Chloe are now smiling..a lot!  When I go in to pick them up for a feeding, they smile and giggle.  My heart just soars and I forget all the sleepless nights.  Then, it is all worth it.